Sweet Spots

I'm one of those nerdy teachers that likes brands on Facebook and actually interact with their Facebook pages or Pinterest boards.  So last night's Scholastic Ten O'Teacher question was from a middle school teacher who is currently stuck in kindergarten.

There were some helpful comments about how to handle the challenge she was actually facing, but there were many really, really unhelpful comments.  There were teachers telling her she should be grateful to have a job, that she would like them by the end of the year, and criticizing her for not liking kindergarten.

I have no advice for her for this year.  Kindergarteners are like nieces and nephews: cute, but thank God, I can return them.  There are grades or subjects that I hadn't considered teaching before and enjoyed and ones that I have sworn: never again!  There is no guarantee she will like them by the end of the year.  To say that she'll like them by the end of the year might make her feel guilty for not liking teaching kindergarten now.  Trust me, there are enough things we can feel guilty for on our own without any assistance.

To tell her she should be grateful to have the job is not much better.  I didn't see what she had written that led people to feel that she was ungrateful.  She sounded like she accepted that she is teaching kindergarten this year and is trying to make it a great year in kindergarten for her kids (why she was asking for help.)  She's trying to make a different plan for next year.  She's reflected on these few short weeks and realized she prefers middle school.  Good for her: we all have our sweet spots and hers is middle school.

Kids are great.  They are creative, funny, talented, inquisitive, and amazing! (Except when they're not.) Since we agree, I'm assuming, that kids are great...let us see if we can't agree something else is great.  Like ice cream.  She prefers chocolate chip cookie dough and people are telling her that she will love butter pecan by the end of the year.  "I would give anything to have butter pecan." say some.  "Why are they giving you butter pecan? Are they trying to put you on a lactose-free diet?" say others. "Butter pecan is the most important ice cream."

I like ice cream, but I really don't like butter pecan.  I would rather have no ice cream than butter pecan. (Is it butter pecan or buttered pecan?  I don't honestly know, I called it butter pecan when I was a kid....it may be something completely different.)  There are plenty of flavors of ice cream I haven't tried that I probably would like and plenty of favors that I wouldn't like.  To tell me to like a flavor I've tried and don't like is a waste of my time and possibly negatively impacts the bowl as well.

I prefer chocolate chip cookie dough too.  Middle school is my fave.  Other kids may be cuter.  They may smell better, but mine are the weirdest and I mean that in the best way possible.  Mine want to like their teacher and want their teacher to like them, but they don't want to hug it out.  They can be awkward and want to know that falling flat on your face isn't permanent (which this teacher has inadvertently proved by occasionally falling on her face.)  They want to figure out who they are as result of or reaction to their parents.  They ask weird questions (what is it with middle school and cannibalism?)  They make tons of choices ranging from stupid (get your feet out of the trash can!) to caring (being kind to people who are hard to like) to inexplicable (if you did the work, why didn't you turn it in?) Some try out sarcasm.  Some get it; some don't.  YouTube videos and candy bring them extreme versions of happiness.  They are my kind of people.

If I tried to be a butter pecan kind of person, I wouldn't appreciate what makes them them.  Don't force your flavor on someone else.  Let them enjoy their flavor of ice cream.